Today is just an ordinary day

It used to be so special.  Third year and we didn’t make it.

I woke up very early today. The rains are so intense. I was quite sure that classes would be suspended. I turned on my laptop, logged in to twitter and then the expected news was there all over. It saddens me that I won’t be able to see him today. Even just to see him. Funny. I’m the one who brought us to this situation. I know I couldn’t bring back what we had. I just couldn’t give-up our friendship. Despite everything, whenever I have problems especially about my family he’s still the one I want to talk to. He’s the only one. But if this continues, I have to give up on that as well.

Have you ever watched the movie Hall Pass?  The same thing happened to me  like with Maggie. I thought the time-off was for him. For him to realize my worth and learn to appreciate me more. For him to be back to the person I have known before. But now I realized the time-off wasn’t really for him, it was for me. All these times… it was for me.

My feelings for him haven’t changed. I still love him with every ounce of my heart. But the question is: Do I want him back?  The answer is… NO. I love him that much that I don’t want him to be with me anymore. He deserves someone better. He deserves to be happy with someone who wouldn’t do the same as what I did.

Complicated. I made it to be. I was never contented. I was always asking for more.

A, life is too short to be with someone who isn’t quite right.



6 thoughts on “Today is just an ordinary day

  1. sad story though i could sense that it is somewhat liberating on your part. my unsolicited advice, give it sometime to let things sink in. then decide. you may not want to regret the consequences of decisions made in a hurry.

    to happiness!


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